Honor Violence,
Shame & Guilt
Forced marriage survivors are at great risk of honor violence, a form of violence against women committed with the motive of protecting the honor of the family or community.
Challenges to family honor, including going against a family’s wishes of a marriage partner, results in families lashing out with violence when women violate the edict that they are the property of their families.
Families will murder girls and women who rebel against strict control.
This kind of violence is one key element preventing forced marriage survivors from leaving and seeking help.
Honor Violence
Honor violence is a form of violence against women committed with the motive of protecting or regaining the honor of the perpetrator, family, or community.
Victims of honor violence are targeted because their actual or perceived behavior is deemed by their family or community to be shameful or to violate cultural or religious norms.
Honor violence can take many forms, including verbal/emotional abuse, threats, stalking, harassment, false imprisonment, physical violence, sexual abuse, and even death.
Shame & Guilt
Forced marriage survivors have expressed feelings of guilt and shame for refusing to marry or fulfill their
family’s expectations.
They are fearful of dishonoring their families and losing a sense of community and belonging.
These feelings are often so intense that many survivors minimize their safety and prioritize their family’s needs over their own.
What Service Providers Should Know
Do
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Let the individual know they have the right to say no to a marriage they do not want, even if they are a minor.
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Reassure the individual that no religion sanctions forced marriage.
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Remind the individual that marriage does not remove the requirement for sexual consent, and rape and sexual assault can occur within a marriage.
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Reassure the individual that they are not alone and that there is specialized help available for them.
Don't
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Do not tell someone forced marriage is a “cultural” or “family” issue.
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Do not use family or community members as interpreters.
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Do not act as a mediator. Even things that seem helpful, such as sharing information about U.S. laws with parents as a way of warning them, can reveal that an individual has asked for help, and this can have serious consequences.